Eau de Cologne: the Homestead Scent

August 31, 2009 by Debbie.

I’m going to be a millionaire. I’ve developed a new perfume!

It will capture all the alluring scents of a homestead …. the musky, senusual (to a doe anyway) scent of a buck at the start of fall’s rutting season (from trimming the buck’s hooves); the sharp atttention getting smell of baby chick poop (from cleaning out the brooder cages); the wafting scent of goat pee (from my tennis shoes as I finally crash on the porch swing and prop your feet up.) Oh, and don’t forget that unforgettable scent …….. hot dog poop being ran over by the lawn mower as you push it through the yard. And blend the cut grass smell in there, too.

I figure this perfume will be an overnight success. After all, all the optimists can’t be wrong and they say when life hands you lemons, make lemon-aid. Life didn’t hand me lemons, which would obviously smell TOO good for this perfume. Life handed me some real poop so I figured I’d make perfume. Oh, bummer, maybe instead of perfume I’d better make compost. Millions lost in a matter of minutes.

It took longer to lose my sanity, but as you read, I’ve finally accomplished it. You, too, if you’re still reading here.

I’ve placed two orders over the Internet this morning, one for homeopathy meds and one for Dean’s Beans  coffee. I messed them both up. At the hmedicene.com site it said my Discover number was invalid and at Dean’s Beans I ordered regular coffee instead of decaf. I know, it sounds like I really, really, really need the leaded version at this point, huh?

I like the 100% Fair Trade that  Dean’s Beans supports and I can’t find that locally in a decaf flavor I both like and my stomach can tolerate. Now I have to use the phone ….. something I avoid as I usually mess up dailing the numbers and have to dial at least 3 times. Dialing 3 times may not seem like a big deal but we don’t keep long distance service on our phone so I have to dial through the Sam’s phone card - dialing thier 800 number and then dialing my card number then dialing the phone number. Way too many chances for me to misdial. As I do almost all the time I use that thing - maybe because I use it so infrequently as the 800 minute card is going on it’s 3rd year in use. BTW, visit Dean’s Beans next time you want some really good 100% Fair Trade coffee.

Why is 100% Fair Trade so important that a frugal (aka cheap) person like me would pay the shipping charges to buy coffee when there’s a Folger’s plant right here in Sherman? Aside from the taste of Folgers, 100% Fair Trade means the workers are paid a FAIR wage - a living wage, not sweat box labor wage. 100% means that ONLY coffee grown on plantations where workers are paid a fair wage is included. Just a ‘Fair Trade’ label means that only a small portion has to be truly Fair Trade. I had to backtrack on my typing …. go to Dean’s Beans and read about 100% Fair Trade and you’ll find out the rest of the story and I can climb off my soapbox and get some stuff done here! I guess mentioning it today is a result of yesterday’s message - Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you. I’m not paid a fortune for sub-teaching but it is a “fair” amount.

I’m a twit. Yes, Faithful Friend, I am. I know you’ll argue with me but it’s true. I’m pretty much OK on emails and other written words but talking face to face is not easy for me, (don’t listen to John either! he will tell you I can TALK), and the phone is absolutely misery for me. Someone approached me after church yesterday and ask if she could hire me to make a quilt. Remember I ’see’ words in my mind as I hear them and I saw my 1″ nine patch quilt that I’ve been working on for over a year and the Compass quilt that is on it’s 2nd year and not quite finished. “You couldn’t pay me enough to make a quilt for you,” is what blurted out of my mouth as I was already thinking along those two quilt lines …… I knew from the look on her face she wasn’t sure how to take me. It’s hard to backtrack at times but I hope I was able to. I’m down to too few friends (maybe 2??)  to alienate even possibilities of friends Too bad there’s no delete or re-wind button on my mouth.

I pulled my next to last chicken from the freezer this morning. Sigh. One chicken left in there. I still have canned chicken meat in the pantry but I like to save that for when I’m too tired or out of time to cook. The replacement meat chickens are starting their 3rd week and growing fast. We should be able to butcher the first of Oct. so I guess two chickens (one in the sink to defrost and the last one in the freezer) will do fine. I’d just rest easier with a few more in the freezer. I wonder how the widow woman who’s cruise of oil and flour never ran out did? Did she feel unsettled the first few weeks when she only saw a little left and knew it had to last a loooooooonnnnng time? She, like us, had to wait not only for some money to buy more but for seed time and harvest to build up her supply. I know these chickens will be our year’s supply, not just til next paycheck time. Puts a different perspective on things.

The meat chicks are now on pasture in the old pasture poultry coop. Next weekend they will ‘be moving on up’ as the Jeffersons’ used to say, to a new pasture coop thanks to the generosity of a wonderful homesteading couple outside of Tom Bean. I will be so glad to not have to drag this 200 pound coop around the yard this fall. The new one is made more realistically as a movable coop - meaning not using 2×4’s and 3/4 inch plywood like I did. For this week in the old coop the baby chicks will be learning to adjust to outside nighttime temps and having grass underfoot (and, hopefully, in their belly as they learn to graze) and they will be cultivating a new garden bed for me at the same time. Course, they’re not adding to the Homestead perfume but we’ll get by. I’d better get outside and experiment with some of that hot dog poop scent … uh, I mean mow the grass.

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