Ponderous Thoughts

May 3, 2010 by Debbie.

A counselor I was once visiting with used that word, ponderous. Since she had encouraged me to question everything I wasn’t sure of, I had to stop her and ask what it meant. From the look on her face I wondered if she meant I should question everything I didn’t understand that OTHER people said and not her. But she did answer my question. Since I like the word I try to use it every now and then. And, no, I’m not going to tell you what it means - you can google it to find out.

I’ve had quite a few ponderous thoughts lately, which isn’t too unusual. Maybe I just have too much time on my hands/mind - at least that’s what I’ve been told. Not from the counselor, either, in case you’re wondering. One of the first questions/thoughts I’ve recently had is what am I doing or what is it about me that either hinders or stops Jesus working or flowing through me? I’m still searching for that answer and probably will be for awhile but open to input.

The other ponderous thought came as a result of a co-worker’s question last Thursday. We had been talking about homestead activities - raising goats, chickens, ect. - when she asked what I am. My poor husband is  still trying to figure that out after 36+ years but I’ve come to realize some questions have no answers. This may be one of those.

Actually, the co-worker phrased her question this way, “I don’t think you’re Amish, but what are you?” The Amish’s faith defines their lives. That’s when it hit me. Our faith should define our lives. And vice versa. If my life doesn’t define my faith, then which is lying - my life or my faith?

Those questions are as comfortable as wearing a skirt two sizes too small.

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